Listen people I want to write a book.
I am not cut out to be a Nobel-prize winning scientist, that is for certain. And ever since I was small I thought it would be awesome to write a novel. I must add that this is because I loved to read. I did not do much writing when I was small. Or now. Why do readers think they can write?
I don't want to write a bestseller, what I want is one of those books that everybody says is brilliant but nobody reads, one that will win loads of literary awards but make me no money whatsoever. One of those books that is boring and unintelligible but is somehow good nevertheless. I will die poor but famous and that is fine with me. Kids will study me at school and curse me forever more. Awesome.
Anyway. I know how to write. I know WORDS. I know vaguely how to use them. But I have a mind as blank as a very blank mind. I got no ideas.
So dear internet, please help me. Give me your best book ideas in the comments section and I will apply WORDS to them and we can be tortured artists together. If I use your idea I will be sure to dedicate the front page to you. I would say I will give you money but my book won't make any so that would be a lie. I will send you fresh brownies. They may not be fresh when they arrive. Life's a bitch sometimes.
Post your brilliant ideas below. Help a girl realise her dream of being a one hit starving literary wonder. Please?