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Friday, 19 December 2008

Common or garden variety


I feel a bit out of my league, out at sea, ten thousand leagues under the sea, that sort of thing. At my new workplace.

It is a place of learning. You see in England, you get universities and then you get Universities. See the difference? I am working at one of the latter. And it is not like in SA where if you want to go to uni and you have decent grades you can choose where to go. Oh no. Here it is super competitive and exclusive and just mad. It can blow your brains just listening to the younger students talking. It is all about results. They eat and dream their grades. And I thought I was a nerd. I am the dunce girl in comparison.

The people I work with all have at least a PhD. I think even the cleaners have a PhD. Boy do I feel the odd one out. These people are succesful. They have ambition. All I have is a nervous twitch. 

Really this place only takes the cream of the geni-asses. And. There is another thing. This place is super posh. Rich people live here and work here and study here. I always thought Eton was a myth or a legend, but no. People go there and then come here to study.

You know I was going on about super posh people saying "yah"? Well, they all say it here. In that respect I should slot in just fine.

But in terms of everything else, for now I am going for the "smile and nod" technique. Really I think the less I say the better. I have no idea what anybody is talking about most of the time, but that smile is plastered to my face. When they start saying things like "Tony Blair ate here" and "Bill Clinton went here" and "the next US president could be right in front of us" the smile reaches Alaska. 

Smile and nod, nod and smile. And say "ja" after every nod.

No one will notice I am an imposter right?

19 comments:

LadyFi said...

LOL! You must also be a geni-ass if you got a job there, girl!

So, polish up your self-confidence as well as your grinning fakely techniques! I mean, you must have something going for you (apart from that twitch) if you got a job at that place...

I went there. I'm not posh. I didn't dream and eat grades - but Oh, Auntie's Tea shop! ... Believe it or not, there are some normal (OK - totally nutty) people there that pretend to be normal...

6000 said...

Ah - you must work somewhere Historic then?

Lived and studied in Oxford for 9 years, so I know exactly when you mean by the "them and us" thing. Except there it's called "Town & Gown" and is often quite violent.

Which is nice.

po said...

ladyfi: maybe they are all only pretending to say "yah" and be brainy?

po said...

6000: aaaah you are one of them too! you and ladyfi! well you a gowner then? I guess I must be a towner. Or an inbetowner?

Being Brazen said...

Well you must be doing something right if you work there :)

po said...

BB: I am pretty low down in the food chain, but maybe at my level i am doing something right yes!

DT said...

Wow Po - it all sounds terribly exciting and foreign!

po said...

DT: I sure do feel like a foreigner!

6000 said...

Sweetie - you ARE a foreigner, remember?! :-)

po said...

6000:oh, yes. But now I feel even more so.

Kitty Cat said...

Fake it till you feel it. I'm sure you have a good reason to be there, and that you do belong.

Dash said...

back yourself dude. if you sit there and smile and jus listen,people will ignore you. fire up and share your opinion. no one else is any better than you...never let anyone make you feel that way.

Miss Definitely Maybe said...

LMAO!!!
are you smiling and nodding thru your lectures too?
there comes a point when you will jus have to open your mouth.
but then again posh people are sooo snobbish

po said...

dash:yeah I know but it is hard to have an opinion when you dont know what they are talking about :)

Miss definitely: I am not attending lectures because I am working. But smiling and nodding is working so far! And asking loads of questions

Medio Pomelo said...

If you just act shockingly normal everyone will envy you and will want to be like you! See if you can create a trend! :)

po said...

medio pomelo: hehe you could be right. Unfortunately I am far from normal myself!

Moe Wanchuk said...

Hey.....my whole life is based on Fraud.

I can't believe my company hasn't figured out that I should be mowing the lawn out front.

Keep running with it :)

redsaid said...

Well, I KNOW you are some sort of geni-ass, which is why you're there. Don't smile too much... Botox is poison.

po said...

redsaid: wot you saying about my ass?

Haha, good point, not sure I want to inject myself with paralysis juice.