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Monday 2 March 2009

The importance of being Hamster


I often wonder why I took to blogging with such enthusiasm. The Dear Diary concept never worked out for me. I usually ended up writing things like "dear diary, I am lame, this is lame, you are lame. School is lame, the parents are lame, life is lame. Even the word "lame" is lame." I was not a born scribbler.

But then I stumbled on my creative writing assignments from school, from grade 9 all the way to Grade 12. How these survived my countless moves I do not know.

My high school English teacher, who I ended up having for 4 years, was a believer in writing in specific concrete detail. She did not like fantasy stories involving aliens. And so all of my creative writing pieces are bloggy style; stories from my day to day life.

For my entire high school career, I was writing a blog. About hamsters.

Std 7, age 14:

Bart was in the second compartment of his cage, nibbling contentedly on a peanut. I looked again, trying to discover what my sister was so distressed about.

"Bart has not had..." suddenly something caught my eye and in shock I shrieked, "The hamster has had babies!"

Std 7, age 15:

"I felt a small ticklish sensation on my toe. I looked down. Sitting there was a small grey ball of fluff, fondly known as Peanut. Peanut's minute paws were perched delicately on my foot, and he was twitching his whiskers in that quizzical manner that hamsters have, and his stubby tail was protruding in a comic way, half erect, as if he was trying to wag it."

Grade 10, age 16: "To my delight, Fluffy clambered over my ear and onto my head. I sat up, and he began calmly washing his whiskers on my head."

*

But it was not all about hamsters. Take for example this essay from my final Matric portfolio (Grade 12, age 17):

"The number of times a gecko has plummeted from the shower ceiling as a result of the considerable steam I produce, and landed on my head is uncountable. ...But trying to pick up a frightened gecko is worse than picking up soap, and I end up dropping it a couple of times before I can fasten it onto a steamless wall.

*
The rest of the writing involves hadedas, my cats and a few about my grandfather.

It may be relevant that one of my favourite books when I was a kid was My family and other animals, by Gerald Durrell. I seemed to have had animals in (and on) my head most of the time.

It is also interesting to note that I wrote sentences about 6 lines long and did not know how to keep it brief. Hmm, not much has changed. I am no Ernest Hemingway. But back to more important things. Hamsters.

Fast forward to today. Here are some
searches leading people to my blog:

  • how many hamsters in 2010? (not enough?)
  • hamster panicking in cage (take cat out of cage)
  • sea hamsters (quoi?)
  • African names for hamsters (ama hamsta hamsta)
Notice a trend here?.

The moral of this story. I am running low on blog fodder. I think it is about time I got me another hamster.

12 comments:

Janine / Being Brazen said...

This post was hysterical. I think you need to get a hamster

mylifescape said...

hahahaa.... strangely my love of pets would fit into a bio system > fish, cats, birds and little rodents! oh well... 3 cats is enough now, coz i wouldn't want any pet to be lunch! i had hamsters growing up too.. one called Axel (as in Axel rose) coz he kept jumping up onto the side of the cage and giving me a fright - he was crazy!

Lopz said...

My parents had the all the Gerald Durrell books and I read them over and over - he would be proud of this post! I agree, you need a hamster. Or a hamster substitute.

6000 said...

As I keep pointing out, Telkom's ADSL hamsters (in Bloemfontein) are the only thing that keeps the web running in SA.

Useful little buggers.

Anonymous said...

I'm not really a hamster person. In fact animals but that is changing a bit there... I'm growing to love the animals loads and loads.

It's sweet though that you talk about hamsters always :D

Tamara said...

hehehe... Loved this. Reminded me off our house in Durban where geckos would launch themselves out of the archaic (non-functioning) airconditioning ducts, aiming for our heads ;-)

Anonymous said...

Very funny! I loved Gerald Durrell too!

po said...

BB: I wish. No pets allowed in my flat.

mylifescape: all hamsters are crazy I could probaably write a book about mine. Not a very riveting book perhaps, unless you like hamssters:)

Lops: I read that book so many times, and all his others too. I never recall him having a hamster though! He missed out.

6000: poor little dudes, it is about time you guys upgraded to carrier pigeons like we have in the UK.

Paula: many people i know are terrified of rodents. My gran refused to touch them. I think they are adorable.

Tamara: oh the geckos were hours of entertainment, mating, fighting, squealing, and jumping on our heads.

Ladyfi: he made me want to live in Greece. Hmm, maybe I should be revisiting that idea...

Anonymous said...

I waffle on about my cats a lot, have to bite back totally random posts about them.

And you know what, it was your dassies that got me reading your blog. Those dassies and their tassies! So small rodents are cool with me anytime.

Anonymous said...

I had a rat once. His name was Rattie. I know, very original.

This doesn't really have anything to do with this post but thought I should share.

Miss Definitely Maybe said...

a hamster ??????
thats a rat in my books
hamster = rat = rodent
I am absolutely frightened of those creatures
why not just buy a cat?
but i hate cats, totally evil looking, alien, black magic performing animals,
okay i wont even bother applying for a job at the rspca

po said...

Rox: I really love dassies, but not as much as my sister. When we went to Hermanus to see the whales, she pent the entire time taking pics of the dassies and just grunted when we told here there were whales!

Sleepyjane: I never had a rat before. Their tails disturb me a bit but they are still cute!

miss definitely maybe: hehe maybe avoid the rspca, yep!