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Friday, 2 January 2009

Big Britain




I heard a statistic on BBC news yesterday that nearly gave me apoplexy. The fact that this statistic was on the BBC of course gives it a 125% chance of being 98.222% accurate.

The statistic was that 6% of British people understand the link between eating too much fat and obesity.

I am aware that this is exactly the kind of statistic that they slot in now and then as a trigger for the more uptight, self righteous sectors of society to choke on their tea and go forth to pontify irately. These sectors of course include me and this is exactly what I shall do.

Sorrywot? Are you seriaas? What-are-they-teaching-in-schools-today-when-I-was-a-young-lass-we-were-performing
-calculus-by-age-8-what-is-the-world-coming-to-we-are-all-doomed-etc-etc.

I am perfectly happy to accept the excuses of greed, of being too lazy to eat properly, of having a thyroid problem, an eating disorder, a genetic predisposition, whatever, but to say that you didn't know that eating too much fat made you fat is just scary. What ARE they teaching people in schools these days?

Ignore the statistic. I am sure it is spurious. The sample population was probably twelve confused 8 year olds or something. It is still pretty disturbing that the problem is so...
huge in Britain.

I know how governments love slogans and educational campaigns and so I, a person who knows the connection between fat and... fat, shall step in to assist.


ARE YOU ADIPOSE AWARE?


Of course political correctness shall eradicate words such as obese and fat. And so I have come up with alternatives. You can either be ATE positive or ATE negative (Adipose Tissue Excess).

Although then being positive would be a bad thing and governments hate that kind of contradictory brainwashing so perhaps SAD postive or SAD negative (Satisfactory Adipose Distribution) would be more appropriate.
But then of course being sad implies something bad... goddammit. I surrender. Obese it shall have to remain.

Did you know that eating too much, and especially too much fat, can, like, cause you to gain weight?

?????????

13 comments:

Being Brazen said...

Wow, 6% only realise that fact???? thats rather weird...and worrying

po said...

Hey BB. I know, if you think about it it is scary. It may be an exaggeration but still.

LadyFi said...

You don't think the word adipose would scare lots of people off - or have them reaching for the dictionary??

I go for the blunter FAT Awareness Week (or FATWA) or maybe, to be hipper and hopper: Phat Awareness.

I guess that is why Jamie Oliver is so popular and necessary in the UK - because in many parts of the country it is quite OK to eat high-fat junk food pretending to be a nutritious school meal!

Rox said...

Crazy, can only imagine what percentage share this lack of revelation in the states, sjoe.

Goblin said...

You know, I did not know that. I thought I was like overweight due to like...the excess amount of dye used to colour my clothes.

Fat and obese are crappy terms :/ They make people feel bad.

I prefer fat f*** ;)

po said...

Ladyfi: won't FATWA have people running for the hills too?

Rox: well, I wonder. But seriously, what do they teach people in schools?

Goblin: you know my dad taught this girl in the UK who did not know that meat came from animals. She told him he was evil and cruel to even talk about killing animals. She thought her meat came from "factories". Scary.

LadyFi said...

LOL - is that true Po? About a girl thinking meat came from factories??! Sheesh! Amazing! Sometimes I despair...

po said...

ladyfi: it is totally true, and she argued with him for ages too. And this was high school/secondary

Rox said...

No surprises there, saw some chick on an eco blog today who thinks that the Chinese fur farm videos are staged and that fur farms are all in America and all nice and friendly places for animals.

You do have to wonder what kids actually learn in school, maybe they missed the 'reality check' lessons?

6000 said...

Next: Why only 1% of South Africans understand that there's a link between unprtected sex and HIV.
I think you just have to look at the chavs in the UK and then you realise that 6% is pretty realistic.

po said...

6000: sad but true about the aids. I am sure the adipose awareness in SA is bad too. I am kind of dismayed about education in general.

Medio Pomelo said...

statistics are scary. the 6% might be linked to the fact that a LARGE chunk of population is "functional illiterate".
How about The Lard Factor as the title of a show?

po said...

medio: brilliant! love the name.