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Thursday, 22 October 2009

Bottled boy

I am happy to say that the bob has ceased to be.



This is the time of year when I remember why I let the BFG stick around. Boys do have their limited uses*.


The BFG is my personal hot water bottle. He is a heat generator, a geyser, a steam engine, whatever producer of warmth you prefer. The poor guy cannot lie under our duvet without overheating.

I lie there like a slab of cold meat and steal all his heat.

He wakes up sweaty and I wake up cosy. Without him I would not survive the winter. We have no central heating. The nights can be a bit damp but I can put up with that.

Yay for boys and their superior thermoregulation.


*Ok ok who am I kidding. The BFG does everything in this relationship. He's the fixer, the organiser. I can't even drive. I just hang around like a parasite and suction all his bodyheat. I'm not sure what he gets out of this. But there is no accounting for taste.

15 comments:

Damaria Senne said...

Could it be that you're his own personal cooler for summer nights? No? Then it has to be your winning personality:-)

EEbEE said...

Try Flab...

Tamara said...

Hehehe... I have the same thing with TSC. He has other uses too. Like reaching things I can't and opening the lids on jam jars.

Paula said...

LOL I agree with Damaria then... you're the opposite for BFG? His personal ice pack.

LadyFi said...

Forget the fixin' bit - how the hell do you survive in the UK without central heating? Are you nuts?! No wonder you think it's so cold.

Welcome to the 21st century - to a world of non-boyfriend heating... Please tell me you have something kind of heater to keep warm with... Please?!

Prixie said...

its love po, simple as that you heat sucker you.

PS read a book called Neverwhere by Neil Gaimen...there are characters in there he might have fashioned on you! ;p

po said...

Damaria: hey I never thought of it that way!! But I'm not sure it works, he passes his heat on to me and then we heat eachother, I dunno by the morning its pretty boiling!

EEbEE: but I do! Every winter! It's clearly not enough.

Tamara: Yeah bfg is good for those too, well, not the raching things cos he is actually slightly shorter than me. And he can never find stuff, even when he is staring right at it, so I come in handy occasionally.

Paula: hehe when I get into bed I warm my hands on his tummy, but there are usually squeals involved.

Ladyfi: But I live in the ghettos remember. We have an old electrical heater bolted onto the wall. IT heats the air about 1cm around it but the air doesn't seem to flow. So I spend all winter lying next to the heater and burning myself.

Prixie: really? Sounds intriging, I want to go read the book now to try figure out what you mean :)

angel said...

My Glugster is also a wonderful hot-water bottle in winter!

po said...

Angel: then he's a keeper!

Helen said...

central heating in the UK always confused me- you wear every item of clothing that you own, but then as soon as you go inside a building you end up taking all the outer layers off. It's just comfising. Far better to have a nice hot water bottle!

And you're allowing him to NOT hve central heating! If you got it he might just spontaneously combust!

po said...

Helen: I know! it is a problem for me cos I am incredibly lazy and can't be arsed to put stuff on and off. So I iether freeze or keel over from the heat. But it is nice to be able to walk around without 20 layers though, otherwise you start to forget you have skin.

Tamara said...

Doesn't him being shorter than you kinda take the "g" outta bfg?

po said...

Tamara: he is big in other ways:)

Jeanne said...

What is it with boys and their personal furnaces?? Is there anybody out there who has even been in a relationship where the boy slips into bed with feet like iceblocks and warms them on the girl's?? I think not...

po said...

Jeanne: it's funny you say that, the BFG may be a furnace in most parts of his body, but his feet ARE like icecubes, and mine tend to overheat so that I stick them out the blanket. We have blanket wars cos his poor feet then get cold. Hmm, maybe he is not human, I have always suspected this!