I smell a giant rat!

I am a dazed and confused person most of the time so it is not surprising that I rarely know what is going on. But I think I have figured out a mystery in my house.

The mornings are not easy times for anyone. I tend to stumble about half-blind and drooling until I can find the kettle to make my coffee. Now there has been a recurring pattern of events in the mornings that has left me somewhat more confused than normal:

Scenario 1:

I decide to have some toast, as you do, and retrieve slice of bread from bag. Upon examination through gummed up eyes I see that my slice of bread has a huge bite taken out of it!

Scenario 2:

I decide to have a lovely slice of cheese. I fish out the cheese block from the fridge. Upon opening the wrapping I discover a 1cm cubed crumb of cheese. Who puts a crumb of cheese back in the fridge, all carefully wrapped up?!

Scenario 3:

I decide to have a yoghurt, hazelnut to be precise. I peel off the plasticky lid flap, to discover that the container is empty!

Is there some kind of a rat in your house, I hear you ask? Hah, no. I have traced this menace to my other half, whom I shall call G.

I figured it out because after my exclamations during the yoghurt experience, he burst out laughing. Apparently he had made a tiny hole in the yoghurt lid, and had drunk 99% of the thing, leaving 1% for later. And just WHY did he decide to drink the thing in this manner instead of, like a normal human, lifting up the flap? One of those unanswerables, I’m afraid. (I think he has some kind of guilt complex, causing him to put tiny crumbs/drops back in the fridge, so he can say he didn't eat it ALL).

The whole bite out of the bread thing has been going on for ages, and quite frankly does my head in. but he is useful for other things, so I must put up with my wholegrain half chewed.