Friday, 10 July 2009

The day of the triffids in my eye

I think this may be my interpretation of a spacehip invading my eye but I cannot be sure. It could be a jellyfish.

I have had a piece of dried plant stuck in my eye for 3 days now and it is driving me neeeeeuuuuuuts!

Well actually it is just freaking sore. I think it is quite big and it moves up and down and is scratching my poor eyeball to shit. I have tried blinking, crying and dowsing it with water to no avail. I was blinded while walking to the train station today by this attack of plantiness so bad the tears were streaming down my face and it just kept on scratching and scratching. I was stumbling about like a very sad crazed drunk person.

I am not au fait with touching my eyeball or having someone touch my eyeball (just fold back your eyelid says BFG. Excuse me while I go to my quiet place, preferably lying down). I cannot look at my eyeball or look at someone else folding back their eyelid and prodding their eyeball (look it is easy I can do it for you. Oh. My. Gawd. I will hurl). I cannot even cope with eyedrops. Even the mere mention of an eyeball has them twitching and feeling tetchy and strained. Rubbing until it goes red and squelchy is about all I can manage.

Eurggh, I said squelchy. Shudder.

I have sensitive eyeballs.

I will have no eyeball left unless the offending piece of plant leaves me alone soon. Maybe if I lie face down in a bath and try blinking alot?

Else I will have to resort to taking the morphine they gave me for my shoulder operation and pray that it knocks me out or at least removes me so far from sanity that BFG can fold back my eyelid and prod my eyeball without me dying of horror.

Work hazards hey? Between mutant flies and killer plants I am starting to think I am in a bad Sci-fi movie, where the end will be death to all but the hero. I really hope that is me.


Prixie said...

you would definitely make a fine heroine!

As for eye torture, try inserting a contact lens after handling chilli! OUCH x 100000000000000

PS: Hope it eventually comes out and that you are not in pain for much longer. 'tis mighty strange its been there for so long. Normally foreign objects are rejected and ejected. hmm...

sarah said...

That sounds freaking awful!!!! You should go see someone about it po!!

cybersass said...

ouch! ouch, ouch! i've had some major eye-issues (including the chili contact-lens one! YIKES!) so i can really empathize on this one. i, however, can easily turn my eye-lid inside out.
hope you get it out soon. that kind of pain can drive one crazy!

Rox said...

Ugh, I get eyelashes stuck in my eyes far too often and also drive myself insane trying to deal with it - not fun.

And I agree, you'd make a good heroine... you should write a real life sci-fi, hehe.

Anonymous said...

I had something like that once:

the first someone said I should put a wet faceloth on my eye (not dripping- but like okay damp is a better word) and by the magic of Rah it came out.

Then there was a time when I had a huge mofo in my eye and it wouldn't go away and I went to the doctor and he said that the thing had come out but had left a little reminder of it's presence and my eye just needed to forget about it and heal and it would go away. it took like a week.

hope you get better

po said...

Wow thanks guys, the thing is still there and I am starting to look like I have pinkeye. I even tried lifting the lid just a leeetle to squirt some water in there but it won't go away :( the thought of going to a doctor though just makes me want to hurl!

LadyFi said...

Ewwww.. how awful! I once had a contact lens stuck and dried to my eyeball. The only solution was to visit the opticians. I suggest you do the same...

PureSlab said...

you need to see a doctor about that i am afraid. I would sort it out for you in no time but it will cost you a flight to australia and a cup of coffee.
the doc should numb the eye for you before doing anything so should be fine.

Tamara said...

My mom's a doctor and when this happened to TSC a few days ago, she advised going to casualty at the nearest hospital - htye can numb your eye, see if there's anything still there with their special eye-viewer-machine-thingey, remove it if there is something there and give you some cortisone drops to help it heal.

It may be that the plant bit is gone, but has scratched your cornea and eyelid so badly that it still feels like it's in there.

Evil plants.

Helen said...

Ow! That's s horrible! Maybe you are the heroine and it's a secret spy camera implanted in your eye and you must defeat it!

I would just go past your nearest optometrist, they're pretty good about helping you out for free if you ask them to just take something out. And as bad as it is, you should probably use some eye drops just to keep it from getting infected. They have them in little squeezy single-dose tubes now, that are a lot easier to put in, otherwise I just squirt them onto my fingers and drip in from there, way less scary!

EEbEE said...

You rubbed your eyeball till it went squelchy!?


we have loads of eye washer bottle thingies in our labs and first aider kits. It's as simple as point and squeeze. They are more for chemical spills but I would have tried one of those before my eyeball went... squelchy.

And if all fails... you could always buy one of those "depth perception is for weenies" T-shirts. :)

po said...

Ooh now I am getting nervous, especially if you advise a doctor, purelab, that really is advice coming from the horses mouth.

I bought this wyewash and will try it again tonight. If it does not work it is time for me to brave the doctor, cos my eyse are starting to feel all strained.

Thanks for the advice people!