Things I learned in the last week

1) There is a hairstyle, a "look", that defines Spanish climbers, and apparently Italian ones too. It has also been spotted on French climbing heads. So far British climbers have not been infected, but will they hold out forever?

The look is: a mullet with dreads. A mullet with these long disgusting scraggly tails that are either braided or dreaded or just loose and shaggy. Euuuuggh.

Dreads are kind of funky, kind of cool in a dodgy climber kind of way. Mullets, um, no. A mullet with dreads is just going too far.

I wonder, is it pronounced moollay in French? And in Spanish, mooyet? Is that a word for "monstrosity"?

Here is a link to another blog, Hive Mind Travels, with evidence of this terrifying anomaly, if you want to see it for yourself.



2)Europe is flipping expensive. When I was an innocent nipper in South Africa, I heard legends of the impossible expensiveness of the UK, where one could pay R30 for a coke. And when I first got here Europe was cheaper than the UK. Not any more, sheesh. Now the UK is a cheap destination.

A friend paid 2 euros and 30 cents for a tiny coke bottle that must have been about 200mls. Which translates to R43 for 350mls of coke.

How do you say RIPOFF in Spanish?


3) English people are into their fashion in a beeg way. Trends change quickly and you have to keep up, changing styles every few months.

BUT. When it becomes even slightly uncomfortably hot, all of their innate fashion consciousness just melts away. English people just cannot look good in the heat.

They do not do cool shorts here. Teeny tiny polyshorts and running shorts, and capri pants on men and oh dear. Even the baggies here are a bit circumspect. They look suspiciously like pantaloons.

And the legs, oh the legs, I thought I was pale but this is supersonic. These are legs that have never ever seen the light of day.

And then there are the strops and slops worn with thick socks. Just what is the point of having huge holes in your shoes to air your feet if you encase them in huge tubes of heat-inducing knitted fluff?

Most of the time they just take their clothes off and parade around in their underwear anyway.

English people, don't be offended by my amusement, I know for a fact that South Africans are the worst dressed people you could ever see in winter. We just cannot fathom the concept of fashionable and sensible clothing in the cold. We all look like bergies and we all freeze to death and complain about the cold while wearing a thin South African rugby jersey we have had for 10 years. Fact. The English pull off winter in style.


4) I love the heat. People have been complaining about the heat all week and I am in my element. I finally feel comfortable in my skin. My body feels fluid and energetic.

I am fantasising about moving back to Durban. I know I thought I would never live there again, and when I go back on holiday the humidity nearly kills me, but it seems to be the only place warm enough to keep me happy. A place where you drip with sweat while lying in the shade. Can I have some skin with that sweat?

Bring it on.